Yeah, I am really sick and all my mom can do is yell at me. About how I am ruining HER day by complaining, and how I am being selfish. Do you notice, that almost always when people tell you you are being selfish is because they are being selfish? I am sick, and all my mom can think about is how I will make HER miserable. Yeah? Well, guess what, I already am miserable. Join the club, hon.
I hope I am not going to be sick for the play. Because that would suck. For the next, like, weeek, I am going to out a Top 10 Something. Because I got an email with like 12 "Top Tens"
Top 10 Things to do at the Mall
10. At the bottom of an escalator, scream "MY SHOELACES! AAAGH!"
9. At the stylist, ask to have the hair on your legs or back permed.
8. Ask a saleswoman whether a particular shade of lipstick matches the color of your beard.
7. Sneak up on saleswomen at the perfume counter and spray them with your own bottle of perfume (make sure it stinx!)
6. Collect stacks of paint brochures and hand them out as religious tracts.
5. At the pet store, ask if they have bulk discounts on gerbils, and whether there's much meat on them.
4. Hand a stack of pants back to the changing room attendant and scornfully announce that none of them are "leak proof".
3. Ask appliance personnel if they have any TVs that play only in Spanish.
2. Try pants on backwards at the Gap. Ask the salesperson if they make your butt look big.
1. Show people your driver's license and demand to know "whether they've seen this man."
hehe.
~*~Claire~*~